In the summer of 2010 I wrote a blog article entitled ‘Love Is A Choice, Not A Feeling’. My premise was that love should transcend emotions; that if our feelings prompt us to act in a loving way then that might make life easier but ultimately it is morally irrelevant. It appeared logical to me – emotions are seemingly hard to control so surely it is better to focus on what we can control – acting in a manner pleasing to the Lord. Jesus said that the most important thing in life is to:

‘… Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength...’ and to ‘… love your neighbour as yourself. There is no commandment greater than these’ (Mark 12:29-31).

And so I thought as long as I acted in a loving way, I was on the right track. However, I’m not sure Paul agreed.

In 1 Corinthians he said, ‘If I give all I possess to the poor… but do not have love, I gain nothing’ (1 Corinthians 13:3). How can Paul separate such amazing generosity from love in this instance? If love could be equated with certain actions then this would be like saying, ‘If I have lots of love, but do not have love, I gain nothing.’ So clearly for Paul, there is more to love than just doing the loving thing.

John Piper in his excellent book Desiring God defines love as ‘The overflow of joy in God that gladly meets the needs of others’. For Piper our love for others cannot be separated from our love for God, as the former flows out of the latter. He goes on to say:

‘Love is the overflow of joy – in God! It is not duty for duty’s sake … It is first a deeply satisfying experience of the fullness of God's grace, and then the doubly satisfying experience of sharing that grace with another person.'

Therefore if our love for others is not rooted in and motivated by a joy in God, it is not really love at all. On the other hand, if we do consistently take joy in God it will also become our joy to love others.

In the West, acting out love when we don’t feel like it is sometimes even deemed morally superior to loving from joy because it involves more self-sacrifice. Paul’s letters on the other hand, are teeming with joy; he says in Philippians, ‘My brothers and sisters, you whom I love and long for, my joy and crown …’ (Philippians 4:1). Paul takes great joy in loving this new church.

Indeed, Jesus’ motives for the greatest act of love ever were also rooted in the joy of God: ‘For the joy set before him he endured the cross’ (Hebrews 12:2). Paul said, in 2 Corinthians, ‘God loves a cheerful giver’ (2 Corinthians 9:8). He doesn’t like it when we give because we feel we should, under some sort of compulsion. God wants cheerful givers; he wants cheerful lovers, and as Christians this is made possible because He is our cheer, so to speak.

Yes it is right to pursue acts of love even when we don’t feel like it. But if we are to categorise love as some sort of choice, rather let us choose to continually pursue joy in God. Let us determine to recklessly pursue pleasure in God forever and to say through our actions that God satisfies us more than anything else. Take joy in God and take delight, as this joy overflows into our love for others.